College sometimes becomes a frustrating time because of complicated tasks. At that time, of course we as academics have a plan or a future purpose of what we will do after graduating from an institution. Did we ever think that what had been planned while in college was not realistic with our lives. Sometimes some of them make it become reality, but many people can not make it. The phenomenon ‘what other people do not try to do is something we really want’ does happen and found. Our dreams during college, apparently could not be achieved as easily as we imagined.
But on the other hand those of us who have graduated from college with bachelor titles have the idealism of not wanting to work in a corporate office because it seems boring and tiring, after college wanting to do entrepreneurship but there is no capital, and the last choice, to continue the master degree but expensive and get a scholarship it requires struggle.
If we decide not to do anything, sometimes we are ashamed of those around us. While life goes on, and we will still be realistic saying we need money to live life. Finally, many of us decide to do whatever can be done.
But still it’s not the same as the desires of the heart, then we begin to doubt ourselves, that anything done in vain without results and useless. So it’s no wonder that many people are depressed, panicked, many are scared and worried about the future.
Even worse, we also experience confusion about what we want to do, and for some reason, the people around us (parents, brother, sister, neighbors) suddenly become so noisy and disturbing with their advice or with what they say.
Surely it would be a bit sad to have to follow their advice that is contrary to what our hearts really want. We should decide for ourselves what we want to do but instead live on the advice of others. Because our decisions will determine everything going forward, if we decide based on the choices of others, it will make us live in the shadow of others.
And the only advice we know in deciding life after graduating from college is only “FOLLOW YOUR PASSION” and “FOLLOW YOUR EXPERIENCE SKILLS” which is the problem … many of us don’t feel passionate or have specific desire in a particular field.
For those who already know their passion and expertise after graduating from college, that is a very meaningful thing and even then sometimes they still question whether what they do is the thing they really want or just part of the doctrine that is entrusted by others so that it becomes part of their lives. And even if they already know their passion, can it guarantee them in the future? Or is it in accordance with current professional work opportunities?
So what should we do after learning that things are not as easy as imagined?
The only thing we can do as people who have graduated from college is to strengthen one another. For people who are already working do not like to provoke and show off because it actually makes other people more insecure and experiencing a crisis of self-confidence. And of course it hurts.
Allah said in Surah Al Baqarah verse 264
يَٰٓأَيُّهَا ٱلَّذِينَ ءَامَنُوا۟ لَا تُبْطِلُوا۟ صَدَقَٰتِكُم بِٱلْمَنِّ وَٱلْأَذَىٰ كَٱلَّذِى يُنفِقُ مَالَهُۥ رِئَآءَ ٱلنَّاسِ وَلَا يُؤْمِنُ بِٱللَّهِ وَٱلْيَوْمِ ٱلْءَاخِرِ ۖ فَمَثَلُهُۥ كَمَثَلِ صَفْوَانٍ عَلَيْهِ تُرَابٌ فَأَصَابَهُۥ وَابِلٌ فَتَرَكَهُۥ صَلْدًا ۖ لَّا يَقْدِرُونَ عَلَىٰ شَىْءٍ مِّمَّا كَسَبُوا۟ ۗ وَٱللَّهُ لَا يَهْدِى ٱلْقَوْمَ ٱلْكَٰفِرِينَ
O you who have believed, do not invalidate your charities with reminders or injury as does one who spends his wealth [only] to be seen by the people and does not believe in Allah and the Last Day. His example is like that of a [large] smooth stone upon which is dust and is hit by a downpour that leaves it bare. They are unable [to keep] anything of what they have earned. And Allah does not guide the disbelieving people.
Narrated from Umar bin Al-Khaththab, he said,
حَاسِبُوا أَنْفُسَكُمْ قَبْلَ أَنْ تُحَاسَبُوا، وَتَزَيَّنُوا لِلْعَرْضِ الأَكْبَرِ
“Correct yourselves before you are reckoned and decorated (with good deeds) for great performances (on the Day of Judgment)” [HR. Tirmidhi].
The thing to remember is never to blame yourself. This is the normal phase that everyone goes through. Don’t be in a hurry and feel burdened by the demands for success at a young age. Success requires struggle, ups and downs, must fail in order to learn, and must multiply find experience. Because everyone has their own time, which of course is different from one person to another.
Allah said in Surah Al Baqarah verse 216,
وَعَسَى أَنْ تَكْرَهُوا شَيْئًا وَهُوَ خَيْرٌ لَكُمْ وَعَسَى أَنْ تُحِبُّوا شَيْئًا وَهُوَ شَرٌّ لَكُمْ وَاللَّهُ يَعْلَمُ وَأَنْتُمْ لَا تَعْلَمُونَ
Fighting has been enjoined upon you while it is hateful to you. But perhaps you hate a thing and it is good for you; and perhaps you love a thing and it is bad for you. And Allah Knows, while you know not.
Allah said in Surah An-Nisa’ verse 19,
فَعَسَى أَنْ تَكْرَهُوا شَيْئًا وَيَجْعَلَ اللَّهُ فِيهِ خَيْرًا كَثِيرًا
For if you dislike them – perhaps you dislike a thing and Allah makes there in much good.
Allah said in Surah At-Tawbah verse 51,
قُل لَّن يُصِيبَنَآ إِلَّا مَا كَتَبَ ٱللَّهُ لَنَا هُوَ مَوْلَىٰنَا ۚ وَعَلَى ٱللَّهِ فَلْيَتَوَكَّلِ ٱلْمُؤْمِنُونَ
Say, “Never will we be struck except by what Allah has decreed for us; He is our protector.” And upon Allah let the believers rely.
Ibrahim bin Adham once asked 3 things to a young man
“O young man, may I ask you three things, but please answer honestly.”
“All right, O Imam, I will answer your question honestly,”
Ibrahim bin Adham sat near him. After taking a deep breath, he asked,
“Is there something happening in this world that escapes the knowledge and will of Allah Most High?”
“Of course there isn’t,” replied the young man.
“Will the fortune that God has given you diminish?”
“Certainly not diminished,” the young man answered again.
“Will the time of death that God has set for you shift and be delayed?”
“Really, it will not shift and be delayed,” he answered.
“Then, why are you still worried, what are you worried about?” asked Ibrahim bin Adham.
As good Muslims we believe that everything indeed comes from Allah. The best thing to do in this situation is to put your trust in Allah Ta’ala like a body being bathed, he has no movements and plans. Even if God’s destiny and determination feels narrow and even then God’s destiny because everything has been set in size. However, even though we are demanded to resign, never leave the business.
Sahal bin Abdillah said that resignation is a gift of Allah Ta’ala (احول) for the Prophet SAW while the effort is his sunnah so who has arrived at this maqom (tawakkal) never leave the sunnah.
Allah said in Surah At-Talaq verse 3,
وَيَرْزُقْهُ مِنْ حَيْثُ لَا يَحْتَسِبُ ۚ وَمَنْ يَتَوَكَّلْ عَلَى اللَّهِ فَهُوَ حَسْبُهُ ۚ إِنَّ اللَّهَ بَالِغُ أَمْرِهِ ۚ قَدْ جَعَلَ اللَّهُ لِكُلِّ شَيْءٍ قَدْرًا
And will provide for him from where he does not expect. And whoever relies upon Allah – then He is sufficient for him. Indeed, Allah will accomplish His purpose. Allah has already set for everything a [decreed] extent.
Nothing happens in that world without God’s knowledge. At least don’t give up and try according to our ability. Whether the results are in line with expectations or not is not a last goal.
Allah Almighty
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